I was actually friends with a guy for four years before we started dating, which is why I was so surprised at how disappointing the entire experience was. First of all – he was incredibly weird in a dating context. He left me clues in Shakespearean code on one of the dates in order to try to find him – such as, “thine body waits for thou at the bubbling water fountain”… He proceeded to say incredibly crude things throughout our dates such as, “I have the perfect sculpted butt” and “my huge penis”. He also treated me incredibly poorly. He called me on Valentine’s Day at 6pm and asked me to “entertain him” that night. He talked crudely about his body, in a way which made me feel extremely uncomfortable. He would blatantly ogle, flirt with and talk about other women in front of me on a regular basis. He kissed another girl and took no responsibility for it. He spoke rudely to people who were serving him and wouldn’t back down until he got his way – with waiters, parking station attendants, bouncers, etc.
He told me that I was a gold digger because I allowed him to pay for the first date, even though we went somewhere extremely inexpensive and a little bit down market. He tried to take financial advantage of a wealthier friend of mine. He implied that he wanted me to take care of his every need, for example by cooking for him and blackmailed me by telling me that a friend of mine did it for her *fiance* who she *lives with* – I think that situation is slightly different than dating for three weeks, as we had been. He implied that I should be paying for him, even though I was between jobs whilst we were dating and I was already finding ways to pay for my fair share of the costs after the first one or two dates. After all of this, he refused to take any responsibility for his actions or acknowledge that he had behaved poorly.
Even after all this, he told my best friend that he thought I was The One and that he was disappointed that I didn’t succumb to him. Really? Who treats a future potential wife like that? #fail.